My Journey to Uganda and back...

How does one begin writing of their journey? Words seem so inadequate; I wish that it was possible to sit with each one of you, to share my heart - to listen to your questions and to pour out the journey this past year has taken me on. Alas, it isn't possible, so I am giving it my best attempt at writing my journey. I'm sure many details will be left out, because words (and even pictures) don't adequately represent what the last few years have held.

Yes, my journey began more than 18 months ago when I was reading a blog, the blog was written by one of the women who began the ministry147 Million Orphans, the blog mentioned a children's home in Uganda. The children’s home had not been in existence long, it was started by 2 young women, both named Emily. I read that this wasn't any ordinary children's home but one for children with special needs. You see, Several years ago through a set of circumstances this too had become my passion - seeing children with physical and developmental delays become all they could be. This combined with my passion for missions and for seeing the Nations come to Him - I knew that this ministry was one that I wanted to be a part of. In October of 2011 when it came time to meet with my advisor for advisement at school, I knew I had to talk with her. Would it be possible for me to take a semester off? Was it crazy that I wanted to serve these children and this nation - one that I had never been to and knew little about? That October, I sat with my school mentor and then my school advisor and told them that I would be taking a semester off and would spend approx. 11 weeks in Uganda serving with Ekisa, a special needs children's home.

After breaking the news to my parents around New Years that year, I was well on the way of applying, being accepted and beginning the task of fundraising to live in a foreign country for nearly 3 months, I was accepted in February of 2012, to serve as a volunteer from May -July 2013 (for those of you keeping up, I know this is a large gap - one that I didn't understand at the time). I still had a year of school and a summer serving as a Cabin Leader at Camp Pinnacle plus another semester of school standing in the way of my semester off and then boarding a plane to Uganda.

What I didn't understand at the time was why the Lord would call me to take a semester off of school to just work, I questioned why I couldn't just finish school, graduate THEN go to Uganda...His plans are always better my friends.

After finishing a year of school and spending the summer of 2012 at Camp Pinnacle, I returned to school for the Fall semester to finish core classes. In October of 2012, my mentor and friend told me of an opportunity that had arose for her and her family to go and serve in Uganda for 2 weeks in February. I read the testimony of the young man that the team would be partnering with and it BLEW ME AWAY. I was astounded and humbled and I KNEW that the Lord was calling my heart too...This left me in a large dilemma. I had confirmation that the Lord was already leading me to Uganda in the summer of 2013, how could He also lead me to go in February?

After sharing this dilemma of my heart and the fears of the world with my mentor she said "Stephanie, don't ask Him about the money, ask Him if He would have you go twice." This was a challenge and a moment where I had to let go; let go of the fear of fundraising, the fear of Uganda, the fear of jobs or school...Within just a few weeks - I knew the answer deep in my very being. The Lord was paving a way and His way had me on a plane, heading to Uganda in February of 2013. I wrote a check from the money that I had already fundraised for my summer in Uganda and that was that. I was headed to Uganda, to a remote village that you can't find on a map, that not many people have ever heard of, that few people are willing to go to.

And so on February 11 of 2013 I jumped on a plane in Atlanta, Georgia and I was ill prepared for how the Lord would flip my world upside down. While we were in Atlanta, I was handed a schedule and warned, this will change - it is a guide but it will change and that was the last of that schedule. I learned more than ever how to simply BE with people of a different culture, language and life. Few words can describe the experience of driving to the middle of nowhere plus a little further only to be greeted by women and children, dressed in their best, waving flags and banners and shouting praises that you had come. I was brought to tears as we climbed off the bus into a crowd of hundreds of people, many who had walked from miles around, just to come and learn WITH us. I was amused and full of joy to see HUNDREDS follow us to set up camp that first night in the village and stare with wonder and awe as they saw white people, many for the first time, set up Camping tents and unroll our fleece blankets for the night (much of our luggage was delayed in London - many of us didn't have our sleeping bags or sleeping pads the first 2 nights). We considered it JOY that we too were sleeping on a fleece blanket as many of those that we were there to love on that week were.

I rejoiced and danced and stood in awe as a team of people from many different walks of life stood in a concrete building with no roof and no doors WORSHIPPING in the building that soon would be filled with many children...many attending school and hearing TRUTH for the first time in their lives. I laughed and talked and smiled so much that it hurt as the team threw bricks into piles, moving them from the front of the building so the children coming to school wouldn't injury their barefoot feet. Who knew moving bricks could be so much fun?!

Our days were filled with learning from and with the groups of Leaders from various surrounding communities, Women, Children and Youth. We were able to share the Gospel, I saw miracles take place. I saw Him provide in ways like never before as He provided evening walks, translators and quiet moments at just the right time. We were able to see so much fruit, it was overwhelming to finally be with a people that we had prayed so much for - they already had our hearts...now many were truly becoming our Brothers and Sisters in Him.

After nearly a week in Angoltok, we boarded a bus back for Jinja, where we would be loving on other ministries there. As I sat on that bus looking out the window taking in all of the sights and sounds, the children playing, the mud huts, women and men working hard in the fields; I was in great turmoil over ever returning. I wanted too but you know there is always fear in the Lord asking us to do the hard things and living in a village with no running water or electricity where showers are under the stars with a headlamp and the bathroom is a 20ft hold in the ground - we want to RUN in the opposite direction and hide. I was there as I looked at the miles run by on that bus. I wasn't ready for Him to tell me to go back and to invest and to continue learning with those that not only needed help in the physical things but also in the spiritual. I just wasn't ready.

That brings me to being back in the states and sharing what God has done and is doing in Angoltok and in Uganda and how that in 10 weeks I will be returning - that's right, gone for 2 weeks, back for 10 weeks then gone for nearly 11 weeks - a journey that could only be from Him.

2 weeks after arriving back in the states and with just about 8 weeks til I am scheduled to board another plane - this time alone - the Lord calls me out. The Lord calls me to go back to Angoltok for my first week to serve and love the women and to see the Angoltok Outreach Center and be a part of ministries going on there once again. Yet in the midst of this, I'm scared, terrified really - you see this means more money to raise...Lord, I'm only a few weeks out I cry out to Him but He has made it clear - this is His journey not mine, I surrendered my life some years ago --- what I want doesn't matter...I surrendered that to Him.

So 2 weeks after arriving back in the states with all of this new stress of raising so much money the Lord gives me a number, a large number, a number that sends me running in the opposite direction. It is a number that the Lord tells me that He will provide as provision for my trip this summer.

Provision. Noun. something provided; a measure or other means for meeting a need.

So He said it, Stephanie, I'm going to provide provision for you, this will cover your expenses plus more - I will call you to things this summer and I will provide for you to be able to meet those needs.

And guess what happened? I began running, running from the number. It was too big, too scary, too unknown and not tangible for this human being to even fathom. However, the Lord never gives up and after just a few short days I wrote the number - I realized that if I didn't write it, it may never be real and I may never trust Him for it. So I wrote it in a journal. Over the course of the next several weeks it was confirmed by 2 dear Sisters in Christ in my life. That was it - I was running with it, circling it in prayer and begging for obedience from the Body of Christ.

Those 8 weeks stretched me in ways that I couldn't have imagined. I had my ups and downs, days where I rejoiced in the provision He was providing, the next day I would be discouraged that it may never happen.

Yet, when the day was done and the plane ticket and insurance was purchased, the medications had arrived and I was boarding a plane - the exact amount....

$10,000.00 was in my account

And I was awaiting in eager expectation of what the Lord may lead me to do with this provision, above what my expenses would be.

And because of your obedience to Him, my Brothers and Sisters, because of the provision that He provided,

113 women in Angoltok received sugar, salt, soap and oil plus a feast of rice, posho, beans and goat on the last day we had Fellowship together.

A university student is in school this semester.

Countless dinners were shared with Brothers and Sisters so dear to me.

Many journeys were had, friendships deepened and my eyes opened. I had the opportunity to visit Angoltok, Lira and the Islands.

vehicles were fixed and petrol money was provided.

One on one times with precious children were had- we went miniature golfing, swimming, out for cake and ice cream or soda.

A Saturday in Kampala doing Street boys ministry took place.

I got to experience and see the poverty and spiritual bondage that so many are still caught in.

AND  More ALL because of His provision!

After returning to Uganda in May, I spent 9 days in Angoltok with the Angoltok Outreach Center (AOC), I was able to hear the vision for the AOC. I saw the need that the school has, the needs of the church, I participated in Mercy Ministry - carrying branches, cleaning compounds, hoeing the fields and sharing the gospel with others. I watched in amazement at how just a few teachers could care and love and teach HUNDREDS of children each day. I saw posho and beans reproduced like never before, children climbing mango trees - laughing and giggling at the color of my skin. I was humbled and brought to my knees as Saturday morning we fasted and prayed for the AOC. Sunday morning was filled with worship and service – I have never before been so humbled to be a part of a church that took their offering and walked to a neighbors home – a man who had suddenly become ill and unable to work – and gave the offering to the family, because as it was explained to me – the church had all it needed, this family needed it more. 6 days opportunity arose for TRUTH from His Word to be shared in Fellowship with the women of Angoltok, by the end of those 6 days 113 women were meeting.

I was full and not ready to leave, yet the journey continued. The Lord saw fit that His daughter needed to be stretched and grew.

We arrived in Kimaka around 3:30 or so that afternoon and I was terrified and overwhelmed as we arrived at Ekisa, 20+ children greeted me, many who couldn't say my name, some who just layed, some who wanted to hug and greet and to be honest, I wasn't sure I was ready for all this. I nearly cried as I said goodbye to my Brother in Christ, Emma, and embarked on a brand new journey - one with 20+ sweet kiddos.

My first week or so at Ekisa was overwhelming to say the least, I didn't know what I had gotten myself into, many times I felt useless and was searching for my place in all this (something that I now realize pretty much EVERY volunteer goes through this questioning). It only took about a week for me to feel right at home - to fall in love with each child, to know their cries and when they weren't feeling well, to know how they liked to be fed or if they liked to be wrapped or put in a stroller for one on one time.

It was fun to discover the strengths of each child and their food likes and dislikes. So much to discover and learn and grow WITH them. I soon felt at home here, I loved walking from the volunteer house each morning alone or with other volunteers to Ekisa, walking in the gate and being greeted by Uncle Simon and the kids, how Zeke would say Auntie Stephanie (like I had never heard my name pronounced before) or how Paul would always run to hug and show you the latest booboo that had happened. Morning smiles from Amy or Debra, giggles from James and morning babble talks with Misach. Hugs and sheer delights of laughter from Mweru when He hadn't seen me in a few days. Some days I walked away feeling smothered in LOVE - it was a good feeling, even on the tough days.

So this summer I learned to love and laugh, I learned to play and run, I learned that love has no specific language - sometimes it’s a cuddle or a hug, sometimes it’s a laugh or a chase, sometimes love is a conversation or a listening ear. Some days love was shown through children who have been through way too much in their short lives, some days it was shown through the kindness of a boda driver or a waitress, some days it was a fellow volunteer or Ekisa staff member and sometimes it was through a friend. I have learned so much this summer that my heart can't even put into words...not yet.

I have friends that have turned into family. I have seen the hurt and false sense of Hope that false religion and cults have to offer but I've also seen the absolutely pure JOY that my Savior offers to all who call on Him.

You see, I thought my journey was ending on August 1st - the day I arrived home. After all, my journey was 76 days total. People could breathe a sigh of relief, Stephanie had made it back from Uganda, alive and well - for so many had been concerned for my safety. I won't say this wasn't a concern but when you step out, walking with the Lord, you are ALWAYS walking into unknown, uncertain territory.  However, being back in the states people aren't as worried for your safety. There is little risk for Malaria, or other common tropical diseases and so they praise the Lord for your safety and for bringing you back. I am grateful for my safety in Uganda and for the Lord providing protection against such illnesses but something happened on August 6th that changed everything for me. 

On August 6th, just a few short days after arriving back in the states. I was in a car accident. I was sitting at a red light when I blacked out, my car moved forward and a guard rail stopped me. As I came to at the accident scene and a young man was yelling at me "Are you okay?" I was confused, it was my car's horn that was blowing, it was my air bag that had been deployed, I was the driver, the one sitting in this car that was now in the guard rail. What had happened? What had happened? After calmly telling someone to call 911 and telling someone else to call my dad. The EMT's, police officers and fire truck were at the scene.  I was being checked out and taken to the ER. My sense of calm never disappeared - my mom actually said to me, "Stephanie, why are you so calm?" I had no answer - I still have no answer except for- it’s ALL Him.

I have struggled with this whole thing, I had barely begun processing Uganda, I am still very much missing it, asking Him what is next and preparing for school and work and then this - an accident. Something to recover from and heal from and work through so as not to be terrified of driving again.

I've been through every emotion this past week from being mad, frustrated, sad, angry, grateful for my life, rejoicing in His protection and knowing that He is in control. I kept wondering why Lord, I was reminded and challenged to keep my eyes on Him - for the opposition comes to kill, steal and destroy but He came that I may have life, life to the full. (John 10:10)

I didn't and still don't understand why this freak accident, as I like to refer to it, has occurred. But as I was worshipping yesterday morning - He whispered gently to my very being that THIS is a part of the journey and it is His story. And He quietly reminded me that so many people were concerned for my safety as I was in Uganda in February and this summer, yet in mere days of me returning to the states I was in an accident - in which I could have lost my life. He reminded me that no matter where I am in this great big world - He is there, He is in charge of my journey...He has ultimate control.

So as I sat letting this truth sink in - He challenged me to not let fear ever get in the way of being obedient to Him. There is great unknown and uncertainty on the journey that He leads us to - but He is always ALWAYS there and in charge of every detail. He provided a guard rail to stop me. He provided Good Samaritans to pull over and help. He provided protection in the form of an airbag and seat belt. He provided a green light at just the moment that my body (in its unconscious state) propelled my car forward. He had me driving at a time of day that isn't quite so busy. He had me at a red light and not driving down the road. These little details weren't overlooked by the God of the universe but instead they were set just so as to protect me.

I am taking precautionary measures and will be seeing a neurologist in the coming weeks but I know that He too is already there - in the future, with me and planning the details.

Friends - if there is anything I have learned it’s that He is the Lord and I am not, His plans are perfect as are His details - don't let fear stop you from walking with Him. He is God is Uganda and Kenya and Haiti and Korea and Canada and Iran and the States - He is the God of this World. He is the God of those trapped in the bondage of False religions, those who are searching and those whose hearts have been hardened; He has the power to break those chains and set them FREE - I've heard testimony of His saving Grace and know the power it has. We are His creation, "He saw all that He had made and it was very good..." (Genesis 1: 30) so friends, please don't be fearful of where the Lord has called you - precautions are necessary but He is Lord over all and we must learn to trust that. 

I pray that you have been drawn to Him through this journey. I have tried to be as real and transparent with my journey as humanly possible and I pray that your heart will simply be to know His heart more – It’s my prayer for myself and for you. 

As Bob Goff says in his book 'Love Does'

"That's because love is never stationary. In the end, love doesn't just keep thinking about it or keep planning for it. Simply put: Love does." 

In Angoltok with a sweet baby boy who I first met in February, he wasn't so little anymore - he was also the first child that peed on me this summer...but definitely not the last.

Can you see the red dirt on me?! The culprit the one hugging me. Mweru, I miss this kid every day.